Are you always this stupid, or are you making a special effort today?
I don?t insult people. I just describe them.
If you liked my profile, Raise up ur hands. If not, raise your standard
If you?re going to be two-faced at least make one of them pretty.
Hi! I?m a human being! What are you?
Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?
Are your parents siblings?
I?m busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?
I?m not laughing at you, I?m laughing with you, you?re just not laughing.
Heard your family went to a restaurant where they serve crabs just so they could bring you along.
Anybody who told you to be yourself simply couldn?t have given you worse advice.
How do you keep an idiot in suspense? Leave a message and I?ll get back to you.
If I want your opinion, I?ll ask you to fill out the necessary forms.
I?m not here right now so cry me a river, build yourself a bridge, and Get Over it.
I?d explain it to you, but your brain would explode.
Save your breath, you?ll need it to blow up your date.
Mix with people with a good attitude.
If you are shameless, you would do as you wish?
Why don?t you understand me like my iPhone does??
90% of the time I say `BRB` it just means I don`t want to talk to you anymore..
Girls & Boys Before Going Party
Define Girl : The one who before going out for a party gets,
Facial, Bleach, Waxing,
Threading, Toning, crubing, Moisturising,
Puts on Lipstik, LipGloss, Lipliner,
Perfume, Body toner, Body lotion,
Eye liner, Eye shadow, Eye maskara,
Foundation, Face powder, Rings,
Bracelets, Neckless, Nail Print
Party dress, Sandal, Purse
and Says “Yaar,jaldi me kuch kia hi ni,
aise hi uth kar aa gayi …”
Define Boy: The one who before going to party
calls his friend and asks,
“Bhai, tu nahaa ke aayega kya ?
Main nahi nahane wala aaj.” :
You?re very beautiful, no doubt about that but I?ll still rate a monkey ahead of you.
I posted on your wall. No, not Facebook, look at the side of your house.
The fault of humans: Never appreciate what we have but when it is gone we realize how important it is
Boy: When U Smile, I want UR #Lips.
When U Cry, I want UR #Tears.
When U Sleep, I want UR #Dreams.
Girl: I`m in the Toilet,
U want my Shit too???